Nothing gives me the heebie-frikken-jeebies more than the thought of ‘just getting by’.

‘Just getting by’ – A numb way of life in which just enough is done to maintain a fragile reality of perceived limitation and ‘get by’, in which a person tells their dreams to stop dreaming and convinces themselves that they are fine with settling for boring mediocrity whilst secretly wishing that their life was more magic but too afraid to become a magician, accompanied by a belief that life is limited and that they cannot be rich or smart or free or happy or brilliant, and characterised by a greasy sheen of dullness in the eyes and a slight dragging of the feet.

It’s a way of life that many people have convinced themselves is perfectly acceptable.

And it is. ‘Just getting by’ is completely fine.

There’s nothing wrong with living a life that doesn’t read like the synopsis of a James Bond flick, lacking the perfume and purr of Aston Martinis and curvy creatures of love, no cartoon fireworks lighting up another adventure-soaked day in the life of a dream hero.

It’s fine. It’s fine to live a boring ‘normal’ life and go to dull work every day and ‘just get by’ as long as you choose that life because it’s what you want and not just because deep down you don’t think you can do any better and are hiding from your dreams for fear that you can’t wrangle them.

But if even the slightest part of you feels a tingly urge to live more and unleash!,
if you sense an urge to tickle life and make it scream in sweat-soaked ecstasy,
if you want to make your life better and more interesting and richer and more yum,
well then, pilgrim, buckle down and listen up…

Sneaky Little Bastards

Limiting beliefs are sneaky little bastards.

They lick their oily fur flat and tuck in their tails so that they can squeeze into shiny neon pixie costumes, sparkly glitter makeup and fairydust perfume hiding their noxious nature, and they fly and flitter their sneakily disguised asses around your shoulder like the fairies in Peter Pan, appearing very tame and well-intentioned and fairy-godmother-like, whispering sugarfrosted lies in your hoodwinked ear about how you can’t be brilliant and how the world is out to get you and there’s nothing you can do about it but settle for what you can get and play it safe and try to get by.

Meanwhile, back on Reality Ranch, the air was obliviously perky and crisp…

Limiting beliefs are just illusions that we’ve manufactured and collected from society’s nervous ramblings, the media and those around us who tell us that we can’t be great as a way of justifying their own bleh lives.

Beliefs such as ‘I’m not clever or handsome or sexy or fortunate or good enough to be great, I don’t have this or that special quality so I can’t make money and be happy and awesome.’

Icky beliefs that tinge the way you process reality such as ‘I suck and I have to fight and get angry and resist and close myself off and be tense and judge other people and myself – because I suck, remember – and I have to protect myself from the big bad world that’s out to get me!’

Resistance. Procrastination. Taming your dreams. Settling for what you can get. Trapped in insecurities. Talking to yourself like you’re a peasant. Fighting life. Accepting yuck. Ack!

Limiting beliefs are the walls that dam the flow of life. Pardon the punks.

They suck the oozingly delicious flavour out of life and throw you the bones to gnash your teeth on.

They’re the sand and dirt that gets stuck in the SillyPutty of your life,
they’re society’s greasy smudged fingerprints on the window of your consciousness,
they’re the filters through which you live and decide what’s possible,
and they’re the reason you’re not limitless, free, happy, at peace, and giddily successful.

So let’s rip off their disguises and get ready to kick some limiting belief ass.

Real Reasons About Fake Feelings

The first thing to know about limiting beliefs is that they’re disguised to make you think that they’re a normal part of reality. We’ll get to killing them in a second, but let’s bleed ‘em out a lil first.

You don’t procrastinate because you really think that you need to do a million little random tasks and make a cup of tea and browse the internet instead of writing or studying or getting work done, you procrastinate because you don’t think that you can do the work well or handle your success.

You don’t really believe the excuses you feed yourself about why you can’t go and talk to an attractive girl, you don’t really think that ‘she’s busy or might have a boyfriend’ are valid excuses to not talk to her, you’re actually shit scared that she might reject you or that she’d find out that you’re an insecure loser.

You don’t decide to sit around and watch T.V. and blob out because you’re ‘tired and need to relax’, you do it because deep down, you’re worried that you won’t be able to get up and make yourself successful and you’re scared you might fail so it’s easier to distract yourself and blur out.

These real reasons – the real reasons that you don’t live better and aren’t wildly successful – beneath the excuses and distractions, these are your limiting beliefs.

Limiting beliefs make you think that you’re not good enough and there isn’t enough and it’s not possible – and they breed internal conflict and make you numb and resist life because beneath the limiting beliefs, you know that you could do better.

Successful people don’t have these limiting beliefs. They either didn’t collect them growing up or proved to themselves that it is possible for them to be brilliant and showed themselves that the limiting beliefs aren’t real.

The reason why most people can’t write well, in my opinion, is that they’re too insecure about their ideas to be real and express their creativity and so they wind up reverting to robot speak and repackaged content. Similar thing applies to doing other things well too.

So the solution? Kill your limiting beliefs.

How to Kill Your Limiting Beliefs

Limiting beliefs are boundaries on your reality, they limit what you perceive as possible so killing them means destroying these boundaries.

You have to prove to yourself that the limiting beliefs that wall in your reality aren’t real.

Prove to yourself that it IS possible to be brilliant, it IS possible to do well in your studies and work, it IS possible to speak to a sexy girl and make her your girlfriend, it IS possible to be rich and brilliant and the BEST.

Some of you might know my background but a quick version is that I used to fail school, I was fat, useless, no girlfriend, no friends and no money. I really thought that I was stupid and couldn’t excel at school and sport and be successful. I thought that people who did well were different to me. “It’s not me to be smart, they have something that I don’t.” I was under pressure from my mom to get better grades at school so I started working. I started getting slightly better grades and that fuelled me to work harder. Soon I was getting As and I realised that I didn’t even need to work, it was KNOWING that I could do well that was making me dominate academically. I graduated with straight As when a year prior I was almost failing. Then I figured, “well, before, I thought I couldn’t do well at school, maybe there are other things that I thought I couldn’t do but actually I can like get a girlfriend and make money and be successful.”

You have to show yourself that your limiting beliefs are empty and pointless.

That’s the only way to kill limiting beliefs.

And yeah, it is really obvious. Obviously if you don’t think that you can do something then you should show yourself that you can do it and then you’re sorted. Yeah, but most of the problem is not being aware of the limiting beliefs to begin with.

When you catch your limiting beliefs kicking in, take action that’s gonna show you how stupid they are and that it’s possible for you to be brilliant.

It’s usually a ‘baby steps’ thing but doesn’t have to be. Work harder that you ever have just to prove to yourself that you can be more successful and get better grades or get more clients or a better response. Slug through the limiting belief’s seductive commentary about how you should just do nothing and ‘get by’ and get up and talk to that sexy girl or make a start on your project.

It’s a process where you slightly push past the boundary of what you deem possible. Then a little more. And a little more. Until you realise that the world of possibility is infinite and the walls that previously kept you in were illusions.

You start out and you have to take action and do things but once you’ve made a little progress and pushed past your initial perceptions of limitation, you start to become a person who naturally makes things happen because you love that feeling of expanding your reality and living life.

Magic begins to rush back into your life and a sparkle is reignited in your previously glazed eyes. No more ‘just getting by’. No more numb yuck bleh.

Kill your limiting beliefs and drag them bleeding through the streets.

That’s how you show yourself that life can be amazing and stop limiting yourself.
That’s how you cultivate a feeling that ‘it’s impossible for me to not do well at this.’
That’s how you become brilliant.

Unleash Reality
Alex

93 Comments

  1. I love this post. The lessons that break down these briers start small but each one ads to the next until you have an avalanche of false notions tumbling down the hill berried under layers and layers of success.

    • Quinn!!

      Super cool to see you ’round here.

      def agree that more stuff comes up as you progressively let go of layers of limitation, but there comes a point where you realise how stupid the whole thing is – and then you stop taking the snow so seriously and start to play in it. the crazy stuff and limiting situations are somewhat unavoidable (stuff happens), but you stop seeing it as such a big deal and stop letting it limit you.

      Avalanches come but they melt right through you and stop weighing you down.

      :)

      keep it unreals quinn.
      and supremo thank you for the comment.
      a

      • It’s been really really long since I last visited here..but it feels so good and inspiring…you are so charming, ..as always..

  2. Alex,

    I really wish you would write more often:). You’ve really hit some great points about the evil nature of limiting beliefs. It really is amazing how they come disguised. I’ve been that down the road of some serious limiting beliefs, many related to dating and women. But, as I started to overcome small ones, one by one, I’ve started to knock them out of my reality. The key is realizing that they don’t serve you. The thing is that most people actually gain something from their limiting beliefs. Otherwise it would be easy to abandon them much more quickly.

    It’s when you stop forcing change and stop resisting change, that it seems to flow naturally. AS has been said before about the word “try” it doesn’t really do any good because it sets you up for failure.

    • Srini-Starr-3000!!

      Yeah. My schedule is crazy lately. got university lectures from 8AM to 6PM every day and almost done with that so gonna dominate and focus – which means less writing time. but also means that when i do write, it’s bubbling and sweating magic. i think it’s gonna be a good thing. just need to get into the rhythms of it and make sure i get some writing done every week.

      limiting beliefs have more disguises than the star of a low-rate detective bromance. yuck. but beneath their disguises they’re just little bitches. so s’all good once you know they’re just disguised chodes :)

      People only gain security or approval or control from their limiting beliefs. that’s only a gain if they see the world as limited. but it’s not. so on a bigger scale, it’s not a gain at all – it keeps them on the same rusty merry-go-round in a hell’s theme park.

      stop forcing and resisting. exactly. let go of wanting to control it – that’s the reason its there. it’s funny cos you have to let go even of letting go. as long as you’re holding on at all, even if just so you can check when you let go, you keep yourself stuck.

      mailed you about the skype interview. as i said, been swarmed with beginning of new university year so sorry for the delay.

      keep it unreals mate
      a

    • Srini, your statement about the need to stop forcing change while at the same time not resisting change is really profound to me — that’s a description of balance I haven’t yet heard put that way. Thank you :-D
      *p

  3. wow – fully hectic post!

    people with limiting beliefs piss me off… but I cant blame them – I was once one of them (and still occasionally am – yes I piss myself off in those moments).

    to me it was reading about people who had killed their own limiting beliefs that got me on the journey. case studies and autobiographies really helped.

    I constantly find sneaky ones finding their way back in and have to tell em to shut the f up!

    • Vinay you LEGEND!!

      hahaha. awwwsome comment :)

      yip. i’m also really big on looking at other people who’ve made limiting beliefs their bitch and overcame ‘em. rappers are some of my biggest rolemodels. hustle hard yo :D

      tell them to shut the f up and go eat a pogo stick. that’s what my great-grandma always used to say.

      thanks for the comment mate.
      keep it unreals yo
      a

  4. TON

    Sigh!!
    Wow Alex,
    You may have just changed my life! Nothing scares me more than mediocrity, but lately i’ve been thinking maybe its not such a bad place to be. I figured how many of us can actually be as great as we dream.
    This post just pulled me out of what was undoubtedly a downward spiral. I’m saving and printing this!!
    PS: I’m gonna have to pay you dividends when my fortune 500 company gets listed. :)

    • TonboooooOOoooooo!!

      Awww shuxx. I’ll change your life anytime ;) haha

      yeah. mediocrity is a bearded lady – fit for desperado losers but ack! if you’re not severely intoxicated and wear an eye-patch. bleh.

      hope you realise that a written agreement is binding. ship those dividends prontolicious :)

      keep it unreals tonboo
      a

  5. I found this post to be especially relatable. I’ve slowly been letting go of my own limiting beliefs but I’m not fully free yet. It’s a hard road for people so used to mediocrity but it feels SO good once you realize anything is possible. Love the blog, love the post, love the words. Brilliance. =)

    • Vanessalicious starry-eyed-raisin-bread-with-warm-butter-and-warmer-smiles :)

      super glad it had an effect.

      you always have a choice. ultimately it’s the choice to either live life or just get by. it’s not a “slowly letting go” thing unless you decide that it has to be. if you want it to take long, it’ll take long. but it’s just the mediocrity faffing around and being mediocre that wants to delay your explosion of awesomeness and the bright cavernous hustle within :)

      thanks so much for the glistening words. means a lot :)

      keep it unreals vanessa boo
      a

  6. Great writing mate, you really are gifted and you make me laugh!

    Can I offer another option? Yeh well not sure why I asked cuz I’m going to anyway ;-)

    ALL limiting beliefs have a positive intent ie to protect us. If we don’t acknowledge that first it’s exponentially tougher to get rid of them.

    What is more likely to happen is we drive them further underground to appear at even more inopportune times.

    Sometimes it’s best to cuddle them, to tell then they’re loved and gently point out other ways to achieve the same result. Then when they’re not looking take the baseball bat to them. Well ok, maybe not, but you get the gist, be kind to yourself.

    All limiting beliefs and all self-talk are part of us, just as much as the side that likes to kick ass.

    A minor quibble though mate, because it was a cool post.

    • Tim you LEGEND!!

      thanks so much for the kind words. ‘specially coming from a badass of such badassedness as yourself. makes me warm and tingly inside. makes my ego blush too.

      i would feel short-unchanged if you didn’t leave an opinion or fresh perspective so permission hereby granted for all future comments evar! :)

      not sure if i agree that limiting beliefs have a positive intent. well. they do but only on a limited level. their purpose is to make us feel secure and approved of and in control and safe… and sure, on a level, that is a positive intent. but it’s only positive intent insofar as there is positive intent in watching T.V. – sure you can learn something and relax and wa’eva, but there are much better ways to spend your time and the possibilities are limitless as their respective payoffs.

      limiting beliefs protect a little skewed version of who you are. they reinforce your belief that you aren’t good enough and that there isn’t enough and that you suck. and yeah, they protect that cute little identity that you’ve built up for yourself, and that is positive on a level, but at the same time they limit you from being completely in the flow of life and limitless.

      cuddling them and stroking their hair and licking their face passionately is def a path to seeing their triviality. but as long as the intent is to grow and not to tame them. you can’t tame them. it’s like trying to tame a rabid tiger. you can tame it for a little and it’ll look cute and match the decor but one day the tiger will get up and eat the shit outta you. it’s in the tiger’s nature. you can’t tame limiting beliefs, it’s in their nature to be yuck.

      and yeah, it’s def a part of us. self-talk and limiting beliefs are a part of us. but they aren’t the entirety of who we are. watching a movie is part of our reality, but it isn’t the entire thing. watching a movie is great entertainment and can be positive, but getting caught up in it and limiting your reality to that tiny moviehouse and the screen and what’s playing is unhealthy and stops you from truly experiencing the limitlessness of life.

      limiting beliefs cause you to live in a tiny little needy identity with wants and insecurities and needs. you can tame and come to terms with these insecurities, or you can realise that they’re pointless and trivial and let them go and be limitless.

      bingo bango.
      tingo tango.
      glory times

      thanks so much for the tweet and the comment mate. really appreciate it.

      keep it unreals yo
      a

  7. Alex!

    Your post was an amazing call to action for me. I’ve been slacking lately – complaining about fatigue. If I want the glory, I’m gonna have to step my game up. And that means killing limiting beliefs.

    Taking action in 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… BLAST OFF!

    I’m outta here, my friend. Time to convert energy to love and creativity.

    • Brett you lord of lords boss legend express beast of magic and glory and magic and glory and… :)

      so glad it sparked some tingling YES to do something and dominate the universe.

      it’s so easy to be brilliant. just take it.

      own that shit proper.

      keep it unreals mate
      a

  8. Yo Alex! Great one man. I think too that you really have to listen to your own heart, dig in to your own knowing and not allow anyone else to sidetrack you on the way to fulfilling your dreams. The culture, society, family and friends are generally very quick to admonish you to face reality every time there is even a gleam in your eye! Just listen to heartspeak and GO!

    • Trisha booo!!

      def agree. i think limiting beliefs are what stop us from actually hearing our own heart. they make our heartspeak distorted and rippled, as though limiting beliefs are a puddle of dirty swamp liquid that makes our heartspeak distorted as though we’re speaking underwater.

      keep it unreals yo trishsky boo
      always and always :)
      a

  9. Jen

    Wow Alex! :) You are unleashing the awesomeness more and more with each post you publish! Spot on, insightful, made me laugh and love the wackiness! LOVE the sneaky little bastards analogy … “They lick their oily fur flat and tuck in their tails so that they can squeeze into shiny neon pixie costumes, sparkly glitter makeup and fairydust perfume … ” I had such a great mental image! and so spot on too … that’s exactly what limiting beliefs are like!

    • JennyBoooOOooo!! … i see yooooou!! :)

      every time i read your comments, little cartoon birds swoon and hold hands and get dizzy above my head… and music is playing, nice music, classical or something. beautiful. :D

      the wackiness loves you jen. i should hook you two up. you’d really get along. make the wackiness pay for dinner though, last time i set it up on a blind date, it ducked to Tijuana to become the buzzer at a discount whorehouse before eloping with the star performer of the entire joint. yikes.

      always inspired to create mental images jenzo. always :)

      interview was magic. questions really got me thinking. super excited.

      keep it unreals yo
      a

    • that was my fave visualotto too !
      (trying to keep up with your daily bountiful word cultivation Alex! whew!)

  10. Alex!!!!
    How are you doing man? It’s been a while :)

    Loved the post, it’s a creative bubble and magical infusion of glory and sun soaked words of wisdom (Ahh, I’m learning)hehe.

    Sometimes I have my doubts if you are not tripping on something when you write these articles, but I guess a good writer never reveals his secrets of success.

    Leaving paris today with Glen!
    Be back in CT before you know it.

    Toodelooh

    • Diggggggy!!

      haha. comment made me burst out laughing a fake Garshwinesque laugh – the kind that’d pop out when he bust a dave deangelo line that nobody laughed at and pretend that he was ‘sending’ to the wooing girls. yikes :)

      no comment on the origins of magic… but your shot was power – amsterdam did you good ;)

      my secret to writing is to own your ideas and personality and not try to speak like a robot and use other people’s ideas just because you don’t feel yours are good enough. that’s pretty much it :D

      super keen to jam at some point.

      keep it unreals yo
      a

  11. That’s a great AND VALUABLE post Alex!

    The tricky thing sometimes, about limiting beliefs is that you don’t really know they are “limiting” until you stop having them … but then how do you know they are limiting? I hope this is not in itself a limiting belief. ;-)

    Anyway ANYTHING THAT “HOLDS YOU BACK” IS A LIMITING BELIEF.

    Thanks for the PUSH and the ENERGY in this post!!

    • Christopher you legend!!

      Love your comments mate. can feel your authenticity and integrity oozing through your words. really inspiring :)

      yip. know all about that tricky thing. to know it’s a limiting belief, ask yourself you are in ease and in the flow of life. if not, there are limiting beliefs: challenge them until there is ease and flow.

      :)

      thanks so much for stopping by mate. always means a lot.
      keep it unreals
      a

  12. Wow! Your writing is “soaked” in creative energy…great visuals…this makes it very effective and memorable! Wondering if phrases like society’s nervous ramblings, walls that dam the flow of life, society’s greasy smudged fingerprints on the window of your consciousness just flow out or if you play around with the words and tap it out. Here’s to acknowledging, visualizing and killing limiting beliefs!

    Rock on Alex :)

    • Sheila BooooOOOOoooo!!

      really really loved the cartoon :)
      - posted a link at the end of this article.

      my creative process is an interesting won. might write about it some time soon. considering using an ice-cream parlor of dreams as a metaphor for the whole thing or maybe use that for something else entirely. most of it is flow but it helps to get your mind to think in unusual ways by systematically considering interesting images and contrasts and comparisons such as edible flowers and breakdancing butterflies :)

      here’s to owning the internet ;)
      a

  13. Hey Alex

    This is an awesome post and beautifully written – I love it!

    Limiting beliefs are nasty little creatures, indeed. Especially because, as you say, we think they’re for real. I love the process you explain for pushing past them and figuring that they’re really just figments of our imagination.

    Thanks so much!

    • Hey Christine you little strumpet of magic you :)

      thank you so much for the kind words. making my ego blush. aww shuxx :)

      your site looks really interesting. taking a squizz around now. will drop a comment+stumble that side.

      Keep it unreals Christine!
      a

  14. I loved this. Engagin, useful and very readable. I will ReTweet. Thanks.

    • Hey Phil!!

      thanks for dropping by and for the tweet :)

      keep it unreals yo!!
      a

  15. Alex,

    Hot diggity dog. You’ve captured my deep blue funk, mate. I know what to do, I know I have to work hard to off the little bastards. I guess I needed to hear a little wisdom about how to do that. Of course, the wisdom would arise here.

    This is me, getting to work.

    Cheers

    George

    • GEORGE!!!

      yeah yeah, i know, three months. i’ve been having nightmares about an evil Scottish cartoon character, entirely cartoon except for your avatar where the face goes, who kept reminding me that i hadn’t replied to this comment.

      yeesh.

      I always love reading your comments. though, in line with above, it feels like i’m reading my grandparents’ love postcards. nostalgia never killed anybody that wasn’t already dead though, or summen like that :P

      university was a helluva crazy 6 months. It was a lot busier than i thought it’d be and, though i told myself that i didn’t want to write since i wasn’t in that writing mode (actuarial science university work can get way uncreative), that’s all just stale excuses.

      Also, i used to run this whole show at an internet cafe. Which meant that i couldn’t do any work from 11PM. yeah, i know. but i’ve sorted the internet at home and promised myself (it was more of a pact than a promise really, i even had my inner self cut it’s hand so we could shake on it like that movie hocus pocus – blood bond yo :P )

      And as for this post: you don’t have to work hard to get rid of limiting beliefs. that’s just another limiting belief ;) you just have to let go of all notions about the topic and step the funk up. that’s not always easy though, granted, so baby-steps or mentally playing it out is always a good call too.

      we’ll be in touch mate. and stay that way too this time. promise.

      hope all’s well g
      alex

  16. Love your writing. Thanks for the kick in the arse and I love your baseball bat approach! You rock!

    • Tess!!

      of all the people i wish i’d replied to before taking 3 months off UnleashReality to focus on university without telling anybody, it’s you :)

      maybe it’s the lighting in your profile pic or maybe it’s some strange childhood association with the name Tess but some deep marshmallowy part of me – the part i hide when i talk to sexy girls cos i think i gotta be badass and cool – feels like it let you down :)

      that said, i’ll give you a kick in the arse anyday :)

      i prefer the vuvuzela approach to using a baseball bat. more melodic :)

  17. I think one of the biggest ‘hurdles’ to overcome in attempting to pursue one’s dreams is not to be scared of being pushed out of one’s comfort zone/ ‘safe’ routine of predictability, i.e. to be ok with the possibility of things going wrong :)

    can’t wait until tmw* :)

    • Bubba, you are the best.

      that’s really all there is to it. fade to black, roll credits.

      and yip, you played more than a small part (“brains” :) ) in my free time being munched but OHMYGOD it was worth it.

      not to say that we can’t figure out ways to combine work and play time :)

      can’t wait till right now :)

      • pondering the fade to black ,roll credits bit.
        i think i know what you mean but
        expand s’il vous plait anyway
        (that is, if this post’s not already 10 years old or summen like that) I’ve been living under a rock you see.

  18. Limiting beliefs *sigh* they are an unnecessarily painful affliction. They get in the way so often and tragically we usually not even aware of their existence.

    Are there not alternate (albeit not as powerful) ways to get most of them handled, I definitely agree they need to be challenged. However I think there are easier ways of challenging them, for instance by being aware and fully present with them – and then perhaps even repeating them out aloud, they often just fizzle out and are gone forever once you hear how trivial, stupid and silly they in fact are.

    Just a thought…

    Was really awesome jamming last night [even if you were a little cranky ;) ]

    Just

    • JustSTARRR!!!

      You’re one of the few peeps who has heard from me these last few months so i won’t have to fight allergations about being abducted by a human trafficking ring to work the streets of Manila, calming old ladies with my soothing haikus and super ninja massage happy ending eeeeew!! :D

      I think that even the thought that limiting beliefs are a painful affliction is a limiting belief.

      There are def other ways to deal with them. In fact, now, after reading this post a couple-o-months on, i feel it was a little closed minded to suggest this method of dealing with them because often, due to their very nature, most self-respecting limiting beliefs won’t be overcome at first shot and you won’t be able to prove shit until you’ve done something else to deal with them.

      Being aware and present is a really great way to approach it. One i’d suggest now if i were to rewrite this. Just being present with ‘em takes you out of your head (where they are king) to here and now (where they are bitch) and you realise that they’re not a big deal at all.

      supremo respect and awesome jamming the other night
      alex

  19. For those of us that have let comfort and security become like a blanket, it becomes increasingly difficult to change thought patterns. There is hope, provided you choose to act rather lament the things coulda shoulda woulda.

    This piece has a particular relevance for me as it reaffirms my current move to step out of the bubble and into the esoteric light.
    Change begins with a decision, a silent affirmation and belief that things are different.

    I have choosen a crazy adventure, perhaps you will choose yours and change your destiny.

    • Jonny Eaglefeather!!

      you are much akin to yoda. and carlos castaneda. and the star of Biker Mice from Mars :D

      coulda shoulda woulda can go shove a vuvuzela up its own ass and then jump on that thing that powers hot air baloons. bleh.

      a crazy adventure is the best kind.

      keep well my friend
      alex

  20. Great post Alex,

    Another one is hearing people say ‘I can’t wait to get married and settle down’ Settle down?? What a truly limiting belief that is that we need to settle down as we get older. I don’t know about anyone else but I intend to speed up and do more!!

    • Hey Amit!!

      Super cool to see you ’round these parts.

      (for those of you perving over this little sidebar convo; Amit is a superstar so chchcheck him out. now. )

      Settling down is the stupidest idea i’ve ever heard. It’s just an excuse. I laugh at those people. or maybe it’s their little bitch egos i’m laughing at.

      Keep in touch mate
      alex

    • with ya!
      I’ve decided to do as Desiderata says:
      Gracefully surrender the things of youth (but that doesn’t mean ya hafta slow down!)

  21. This article has definitely woken me up to some of my own limiting beliefs. We must always live consciously and be aware of the things holding us back: beliefs, thoughts, attitudes, and actions all included.

    • Steven you CHAMPION!!

      Super cool to see you unleashing it up this side; even if it is a cameo-style appearance where you turn and wink to the cameras before cookie-cuttering a coupla soundbytes :P

      keep it reals mate :) and in touch
      alex

  22. I am aware of my limiting beliefs, and while I still believe some of them I am learning to accept them and stop fighting them. I think that’s an important step. Otherwise, it is simply about experiencing different sittutions and allowing different things about yourself to be revealed.

    thanks for the article. always good stuff

    • Yo M to the Gstarr!!

      def agree about allowing and accepting.

      In retrospect i was way closed minded in my suggestion on dealing with limiting beliefs but that may have just been my own limiting beliefs trying to pickpocket some good ol’ fashion glory.

      keep it unreals yo
      a

  23. Just getting by scares me too. In fact i use this fear as a motivator. Thankfully I’ve been on a roll lately and any limiting beliefs I had are mere laughing matter.

    • Anthony Superstarr!!

      Yeah yeah i know this is like 3 months late but university got mad busy :)

      in hindsight i think that the fear of just getting by may have itself even been a limiting belief. though to take it further than that may just be going in circles. And circles are closed shapes. Nothing is implied here. Except that everything is connected :P

      Just remember, just because you’re on a roll doesn’t mean that life’s gonna smother you in tomatoe sauce and take a bite outta you – don’t even think about being on a roll because that includes the possibility of unrolling :P

      just keep on rolling :)

      and keep in touch mate :D
      alex

  24. Very well said Alex, and although initially easier said than done, squashing limiting beliefs is something we can all do. I’m by no means perfect myself, but it’s hard to not feel an aura of confidence when we accomplish something we didn’t think we could do. It’s almost as if the entire following week you feel like a new, stronger person. If you make such a practice routine, then EVERYDAY you can feel like this; feel like you have all the confidence in the world riding on your shoulders. It’s certainly a nice place to be, and one that helps us excel in the places we really want to.

    • Travis you badass legend bowss dogg!!

      so funny how, looking back at this post 3 months later, i see how differently i was thinking.

      I think it was way closed minded to have suggested this as the solution because, by their very nasty nature, no self-respecting limiting belief will let you overcome it to show yourself that it’s stupid. you’ve break it down a lil first by being aware of it and present and destroy the foundation on which it rests. At least small chunk it or summen, rather than straightup kamikaze its ass :P

      I’m so with you about the feeling of dominating something that felt un-dominatable. I just think that 3-month-ago-me was being a lil cocky and stupid by thinking that this approach was possible across the board. In some, if not many cases, hellYEAH, but def not always.

      thanks so much for your comment mate

      really means a lot

      keep well and in touch
      alex

  25. Illuminating. Now the pesky things have a name so I hunt them down. Thanks for the stalking tip!

    • Adam you superstarr legend badass glory rhythm master 3000 deluxe!!

      yeahyeah, you prolly don’t even remember who i am.

      it’s 3 months later. i know, i know. No, i wasn’t abducted by a human trafficking and taken to Manila to woo old lady-men with my haikus and superior ninja dance technique… so there goes the only shot i had at a valid excuse for not replying to a comment for 3 months :P

      i was at university and it got waaaay crazier than i thought. and then – dingdingding – limiting beliefs about not being able to write “because i’m not in the zone and the mood and the planets are not aligned and bleh!!” all kicked in. but full back in mode and i’ve signed a pact with myself (we even cut our hands and shook on it like in that old school movie Hocus Pocus, which pretty much means we’re stuck in the lemonaide queue in hell if i break my promise)

      Make sure you rip out and eat the heart when you hunt down those limiting beliefs. learnt that last bit about eating the heart from my homie Bear Grills. Just saying. :)

      hennyway, back and in full mode so drop by again.

      keep it unreals and thanks so much for the comment mate

      let me know if you want me to check out something of yours and pimp it to the stoneage :)

      alex

  26. Wow, did I need to read that today!
    Ok, lets just check, do I:
    - have a tingly urge to live more and unleash – tick
    - sense an urge to tickle life and make it scream in sweat-soaked ecstasy – absolutely
    - want to make my life better and more interesting and richer and more yum – duh!
    So, it sounds like it’s time to get out there and hunt down some sneaky little bastards in shiny neon pixie costumes, and kick their sneakily disguised asses…if anyone needs me, that’s where I’ll be.
    U rock!
    Topi

    • TopiStarrr!!

      so glad you found it helpful!! makes my blood do backflips and sing the same song that it sings when it smells my grandmother’s chicken soup. eerie. and warm. and tingly :)

      just be sure to rip out and eat those limiting beliefs’ heart when you’re done with ‘em. some kind of mythology behind it. Bear Grills said so :)

      U rock times a billion. and won. plus infinity.

      so there :P

      keep in touch Topi boo.

      and thanks so much for the comment.

      Lemme know if you want me to pimp out something of yours :)

      alex

  27. Ash

    I have absolutely no idea how I’ve never come across you before, but let it be known that I’m in love. ;)

    Fantastic freaking post. I’m a sucker for the humor you inject into your posts.

    Rock it!

    • ASH boooooooooooooooooooo!!!

      you’re my shero. like hero. but a girl.

      just saying.

      I recognise your gravatar from jonny’s book. from ways back.

      yeah yeah. i know. this reply is like 3 months late. could say that i god abducted by aliens to a teaparty with Elvis and MJ and Thomas Pynchon, but i see no reason why any alien smart enough to come all the way to earth would want to stick a teaspoon up my ass and eat my brain. makes no sense. so there goes my only shot at a valid excuse :)

      university timezz was a hectic 3 months. but all’s well.

      so we’ll be in touch :)

      keep well Ash boo
      alex

  28. Jay

    Great post Alex.

    I’ve recently done some of my very own limited-belief-butchering while setting up my blog.

    It felt bloody fantastic!

    • JayStarr Deluxe

      wadup homie

      yeah yeah, i know this is like 3 months late. and that is straight up sacrilege. and no, i wasn’t sent to tijuana by a human trafficking ring. nor did aliens want to stick a hairdryer up my ass. which pretty much kills my chances of a valid excuse for such a long-overdue comment reply.

      but thanks for dropping by :)

      hope all’s well yo.

      holla on how your site’s going. i’ll namedrop it in a post soon :) actually, cancel that. you haven’t posted in almost as long as me. enjoy the fake testimonial timezz :)

      p.s. chchcheck out gary vaynerchuk on youtube. dude’s legend

      alex

  29. Jay

    Great post Alex.

    I’ve recently done some of my very own limited belief butchering while setting up my own blog.

    It felt bloody fantastic!

    • s’cool. double comment all you like. makes me look cool on the comment count. which in turn makes me pick up chicks. nothing is implied here. except that everything is connected. wooooosh

  30. well written Alex
    i believe that the key to success is getting rid of these limiting beliefs, thank you:)

    • Farouk you legend!!

      big up for the comment mate. really really appreciate it.

      i don’t believe in a key to success. to me, success is about banging the door off its hinges. though, actually, yeah, a key is prolly an easier option :)

      keep it unreals mate
      alex

  31. Alex – freakin’ awesome post man! You’re right about those limiting beliefs sneaking up on you. Sometimes we do it without even realizing it. Sometimes you gotta just let loose and grab life in a big way to get rid of big time limiters.

    First time on the site – really have enjoyed it.

    Mike

  32. I’ve seen the hell of letting yourself believe your own lies. I was a shy kid and I focused more on what other people thought of me than anything else. Since I was so awkward, and didn’t want to talk to people, nobody wanted to talk to me, and that didn’t help my shyness, awkwardness or my social aptitude. So I lived life as an introvert. I spent a lot of lonely nights thinking about my past errors and how they affected me and how I can’t get time back. It’s irrefutable the fact that dwelling on one’s past mistakes just aids depression, it makes our outlook on life a lot darker, and it contributes to these limited beliefs you’ve described. As an example, to this day I still believe I am a shy person, although I’ve mostly conquered my fears, sometimes I believe I can’t control it, and the worst part is it’s really hard to discern the reason why I just can’t speak up. Whether the reason is I’m too tired or that I just don’t think what I have to say is all that interesting. After all this time in my own body and I’ve yet to solve the mysteries of the inner-workings of my own mind.

    What really helped with my skeptical beliefs is sorting out logical fallacies I’ve always had, like believing I’m limited in what I can think or do because I have ADD. I’ve disproved this since I’ve observed the same symptoms of ADD in my father for a long time, and he’s very successful and very skilled, and has a very clear outlook on life. He’s helped me realize that having a disorder does not absolutely limit your success. He was never diagnosed with ADD so I can’t prove he has it but what I do know is that he’s unaware of any affliction. The simple fact of knowing creates such a huge boundary in our minds. The human mind is so powerful we can control anything we believe. Simply knowing carries the implication that you should feel afflicted and the course of your actions is changed to suit.

    What I’ve learned is success is the result of two things: hard work and determination. Nothing else is involved.

  33. When are you updating gangsta? :)

  34. that’s an excellent article alex, which i thoroughly enjoyed.

    You’ve surprised me, so sorry i took so long to read your blog ~ i love it!

    look after odette and take care, debi xx

  35. wow
    “The reason why most people can’t write well, in my opinion, is that they’re too insecure about their ideas to be real and express their creativity and so they wind up reverting to robot speak and repackaged content. Similar thing applies to doing other things well too.”
    This is an amazing post and what you have said is so true – often we are limited in our ideas that we can’t even go about expressing our creativity in our posts.
    Great job and awesome post! :D

  36. I have to completely disagree with you on how to kill limiting beliefs.

    Whilst proving to yourself that you can actually go X, there are many methods that allow you to change a limiting belief into an empowering one.

    Robert Dilts has written extensivley on the subject, and fields of study like Neuro-Linguistic Programming (which is behavioural modification science) describe numerous methods that are useful for chaanging beliefs.

  37. Hey Andrew!

    Firstly, thanks for the comment and stepping up and giving me some shit. makes me feel like i’m in the middle of a rap battle and the opposition said something lucid instead of just something bleh about my mom nahmean?! :)

    To be honest, i completely disagree with myself too. Wrote this won a while back and it was completely shortsighted to have suggested this to be the only way – or indeed a way at all – to kill limiting beliefs.

    I’m relaunching my site within the next couple of weeks and will talk about it a little and about my overall shift in perspective about things like this.

    I do think that showing yourself that you can do things by stepping up in the face of yuck limiting feelings does really work. but not only is that advice completely inapplicable and “easy to say”, but it’s also really insensitive to people’s situations. And yip, there are def often better ways to deal with limiting beliefs. Much better ways. But, i guess when i look back at my headspace when i wrote this, that’s kinda what i was getting at but never really straight up said. All methods of limiting beliefs are just meant to show you that it’s possible to do things. That’s the opposite of a limiting belief, it’s a belief of possibility. And ideally, not even a belief anymore so much as a knowing – i KNOW i can get this and that done. And things like NLP and binaural beats and meditation and tantric gangbangs and any other wacky method of liberation – they’re all there to SHOW you that you can do things. Different paths to the same place.

    A bunch of my friends are into NLP and i use many NLPesque methods and ideas but the idea of listening to some creepy old man speaking like his voice has been strained through a 90′s modem made out of barbed wire instead of plastic kinda creeps me out. And a lot of it is just showmanship and greasy fluff talk. Lotsa more effective and less sleazy ways to employ the same ideas in my opinion. but def has great benefits when used right.

    anyways, thanks so much for stopping by and adding your thoughts man, really appreciate it.

    hope you keep well and in touch. drop me a mail whenever.
    alex

    • Hi, Alex.
      Nice to see the raw honesty in your reply to Andrew, and the open mind.

      I’d like to add something for your consideration. We are not victims of our beliefs. At some point we chose to create them or adopt them from others. We made that choice at that time because we didn’t have the awareness to deal with life effectively and the beliefs gave us a sense of safety.

      For example, a toddler screams at the top of it’s lungs for the pure joy and wonder of experiencing its amazing voice. The parents yell at the child and punish it in whatever way. The child experiences pain, rejection, and separation. It then creates the belief that it is not safe to use its voice. In elementary school the child speaks without raising his/her hand and gets punished by the teacher. The belief is reinforced. Fast forward to adult life and the person is terrified of speaking their mind and feelings. Why? Because a belief chosen in childhood for the sake of safety is still running the show.

      If the adult can look at the fear of speaking and ask when they chose to believe speaking was unsafe they can get to the root of the limiting belief and see that it no longer applies. They can release the choice with the belief and make a new choice based on current awareness.

      As long as we believe that we did not choose our beliefs, that they were forced on us, we remain powerless to alter or discard them. Choice is the great power we all possess but we can’t use it if we deny it.

      As crazy as it seems from our adult perspective, every limiting belief is chosen as a means to protect us. It’s all pain avoidance and survival assurance. If self-awareness were taught in schools we could grow up with the ability to re-assess our beliefs as we mature, tossing out the old ones that are no longer useful or appropriate. That would support an amazing society. As it is, we can make this choice now. We can choose to look at our beliefs and acknowledge that we chose them. As self-awareness expands it’s easy to see the silliness of old beliefs and discard them.

      Peace and Play!
      Jaq

      • This “free sharing” of inaotmfrion seems too good to be true. Like communism.

  38. You know what’s interesting to me?

    Ironically, a lot of people heavily immersed in personal development have the most limiting beliefs.

    There’s a lot of people who take on a holier than though attitude about everything.

    Don’t eat only raw foods? Your unhealthy and therefore must be less intelligent/worthy.

    Drink coffee or alcohol? Your addicted to drugs and therefore are not spiritual.

    It’s interesting. I’m not upset about it though. It’s just interesting to observe.

  39. Hi Alex,
    This is an interesting post on an important topic!

    I’ve just tried to make a generalised formula for success, which aims to be a broad way of breaking success down. I hadn’t thought of adding a section on belief systems to the model, but after reading your post I think it would be a good addition. I invite you to give it a read and I’d love to hear your comments! http://personaldevelopmentscience.com/a-general-formula-for-success/

    Warren

  40. Limiting beliefs, end when we no longer rely on our comfort zone for a pillow. Sleep under change and wake up, right as rain.

  41. I think success is driven by motivation…If in life you don’t see money as your goal, you need some other reason to motivate you…I think that’s a workable formula for success…It also depends on how one defines success…For some it’s accumulating knowledge…that may never impact greatly on the society, for some it’s seeing their loved one happy which drives them to search for sustainability,…for some it’s just a subliminal search for anything that emancipates from them from solitude….

    But Bureaucratic systems usually enforce restrictions on the human beings imagination and innovative capability….It’s just my constrained take on life…

    Hi Alex

    I think limiting beliefs helps a focus oriented approach as the universe may too vast for an average human brain…Knowing too much may drive some people over the edge….

    Okay I’m definitely lost…

  42. I can’t help but keep mentally collecting the illuminated ways you present your thoughts to us, Alex: Limiting Beliefs are…
    “the sand and dirt that gets stuck in the SillyPutty of your life,
    they’re society’s greasy smudged fingerprints on the window of your consciousness,
    they’re the filters through which you live and decide what’s possible,
    and they’re the reason you’re not limitless, free, happy, at peace, and giddily successful.”
    This is SO me and my limiting beliefs , but they’re rapidly fading from reading every single word on your blog~ *p

  43. I just love it !

    You are so amazing :) Can i say one more time, that i love it

  44. This is fantastic writing, couldn’t have said it better myself..

    Had to get over a limiting belief that I couldn’t add anything to the comments thread!

    Have you checked out Jonathan Mead’s limiting beliefs ditty that he’s posted? Sums it up very nicely.

  45. I needed this thanks bro

  46. It is refreshing ready such a great post. The intellect that is within the simple break down of the steps, is brilliant.

    I did not leave this post without taking something from it with me and this is rare to find online any more, excellent job.

  47. Really good post, thanks a lot for sharing!

  48. This is the best thing I have ever read. Hands down. Thanks man.

  49. Yo

    Hip(pie) layout =D

  50. Ben

    Hi Alex,
    I like it. There is definately alot of ‘lies’ we believe that are holding us back.. and to be able to let that go and get to the truth of who we are.. powerful, confident, successful by letting go of our limiting beliefs.. but also limiting emotions, past experiences that are still effecting us is where the power lies.

    I prefer to use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to do this, have you ever tried it? From what i’ve read so far, I definately think you would be open to exploring it. My website has a article and some videos on the basics of it. http://www.youremotionalfreedom.com

    -Ben

  51. Awesome post! Just about finished reading “The War of Art” , and this was the perfect compliment to Book One. I truly believe that the possibilities are endless… we just have to believe and then put in the work. Be it, mental, emotional, spiritual, physical or all at the same time!

  52. I’ve definitely been in a slump of limiting beliefs lately. I think many people (even entrepreneurs) suffer from this from time to time in a struggling economy. The expression that enforces these tamed goals for me is “Be grateful for what you have”. How do YOU balance gratitude with extending your desire for more? I’m curious :)

  53. Wow I loved the article, and I could read the comments all day! Alex, I love the humor you inject into your writing, very snarky.

    And you are spot on about how seductive and under-the-radar these limiting beliefs are – After a few layers of those beliefs were peeled back in my own life, I had this amazing moment of clarity in which I accepted that there were going to be many more layers.

    But every day, it’s a little brighter. And I know I’m in there somewhere, so eventually I will exorcise the last of these little buggers.

    Be well!

  54. I am so thankful for this post and kudos for sharing it with us.

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